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TYPE OF CEREMONY

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How do I decide what type of ceremony I want?

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TYPES OF WEDDING CEREMONIES

Roman Catholic Eastern Orthodox Jewish Protestant Civil Military Double Personalizing

Most brides-to-be have always fantasized about their wedding day. How wonderful and beautiful it can be! Determining the type of wedding ceremony is a decision that should be made by both you and your fiancé according to your personal preference and religious beliefs. If you and your fiancé both have similar religious backgrounds, this decision may be easier. However, it is important and should be discussed so that you both feel comfortable. If you are of different denominations, you may mutually agree on one religious wedding ceremony, try to combine ideas from both, or create your own ceremony. Make sure you are aware of all practices, beliefs, and regulations of the congregation you select.

Marriage being one of the seven sacraments, most parishes require pre-marital counseling so the couple can prepare for their life together. The Church discourages weddings from taking place on Sunday or holy days and after 6 p.m. on Saturdays. They also require that traditional vows be said, although slight changes may be possible as longs as the meaning remains the same. The most traditional and religious wedding ceremony is one that takes place at high noon-a Nuptial Mass. You may also want to include one or both of the following symbolic rituals: the bride places the bouquet at the shrine or statue of Mary while a prayer is said, or you both light one larger unity candle from two smaller ones to signify your new life together.

In the case of an interfaith marriage, a priest will usually agree to co-officiate with a Protestant minister.

The churches of the Eastern rite, including Russian and Greek Orthodox, are similar in many ways to the Catholic tradition. Interfaith marriages are allowed, providing the non-Orthodox party is baptized Christian. Remarriages are also acceptable if religious decrees of annulment have been received, followed by a civil divorce.

The Orthodox ceremony is long and full of symbolism. It usually takes place in the afternoon or early evening, but not during seasons of fasting or certain holy days. The wedding ceremony begins with a betrothal ritual in which the rings are blessed, exchanged three times to signify the Holy Trinity and than placed on the bride's and groom's right hands. At the end of the betrothal ritual, two crowns are placed on the heads of the bride and groom and are exchanged three times. A Gospel is read; the couple drink from the same glass of wine three times. This signifies their everlasting love and commitment to share both the happy and sad times in marriage

Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform are the three groups within the Jewish religion, with the Orthodox being the strictest in following the Jewish law. Conservative falls in the middle, while Reform is the most liberal of the three. The Jewish wedding may take place at any time, other than on the Sabbath, major festivals, or other holy days. It may not take place during the 49 days between Passover and Shavout, with the exception of the 33rd day.

The wedding ceremony ends with the reciting of the seven blessings. The bride and groom drink the blessed wine from a glass; the glass is wrapped in a napkin, and then smashed beneath the groom's foot. There are different beliefs for the act of smashing the glass. One represents an expression of sadness over the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem in 70 A.D. This is to remind the bride and groom of their obligation to rebuild Zion, and that even in the midst of the festivities; they must not forget that life is not all happiness. As with many cultures throughout the world, the making of noise is considered a manner in which to ward off evil spirits, which the superstitious believe will want to harm the good fortune of the bride and groom.

While most Protestant churches have similar marriage ceremonies, each sect has its own practices and traditions. It is best to go over the regulations of the church with the clergy member that you select. Some are reluctant to perform a wedding ceremony on Sundays or holy days, although it is allowed. The, too, churches may have restrictions against certain music, the use of candles, or photography. And many churches will require both of you to attend pre-marital counseling sessions with a clergyman

Interfaith marriages are accepted in most sects, as long as one partner is a baptized member of that sect. In the case of divorced persons, a "church judgement" as well as civil divorce papers may be required

In Protestant wedding ceremonies the bride is escorted down the aisle and given away by her father. If he is not available, a brother, relative or close friend may escort her, or she may choose to walk down the aisle alone. The marriage vows end with "till death do us part." And many go on to finish the wedding ceremony with the Lords' Prayer. Prayer.

A civil wedding ceremony is performed by a judge or authorized official, and may take place in a courthouse or judge's chambers. Civil wedding ceremonies of this type are ideal for small informal weddings and often the choice for remarriages or couples with religious differences. A small reception may immediately follow or a larger celebration may be held at a later time. Popular locations for larger civil ceremonies include: homes, gardens, clubs, or hotels. The procedures would follow that of a religious wedding ceremony in dress and formality. A reception usually follows immediately.

Traditionally military wedding ceremonies usually take place at military chapels. However, other locations are sometimes used. The groom and military attendants dress in appropriate uniforms (white in summers, blue in winter). Officers carry a sword or saber, and boutonnieres are never worn. An arch of sabers, swords or rifles, which the new couple walks through, is formed at the exit of the wedding ceremony and/or entrance to the reception.

Non-military attendants, fathers, and the bride should dress in traditional formal attire. If the bride is a military officer she may opt to wear her dress uniform.

One double wedding can cut down the expense of holding two separate weddings, especially if the couples include family members, two sisters, or brother and sister, where a great many of the guests would have been the same for both. There are different ways of conducting the wedding ceremony. The younger bride may follow the older one down the aisle, they may choose to use the same bridal party, or each may have her own. It all depends on the available space and individual situation.

Today more and more couples are composing their own wedding ceremony. There are a number of ways you and your finance can add that personal, creative touch to your wedding. You may want to write your own vows or change some of the words of traditional vows. Whatever you decide, give a typed copy to the officiant a few weeks before the ceremony so he or she can become familiar with it. You both may want the officiant to read the vows or may choose to read the vows to each other. In this event, be sure to keep a copy for yourselves and go over them until you feel comfortable with the lines. It's wise to keep the bride's and groom's speaking parts short since it's easy to forget your lines in the excitement of the moment.